Snow
by ziennajames
Summary: "There's so much that binds us. Love. Hatred. Blood. Time. Or in this case, snow." RLSB maurauder-era; SSHG, HGRW, HPDM post-Hogwarts era. Happy Valentinesday!


**SNOW**

There's so much that binds us. Love. Hatred. Blood. Time. Or in this case, snow.

_"I'm a Collector of Memories, forever a Work In Progress._

_Run after me and catch me,_

_Just try me now, you won't succeed._

_But nothing bad will happen when we're close together_

_so just hold on, hold on..."_

_

* * *

_

"Hey Remus, come on!" he yelled, eyes shining and his whole presence literally lightening up the dark. Our experimental charms-work had paid off.

I simply obeyed, following his voice without thought. When I had caught up with him, he grabbed my hand, pulling me closer. Snowflakes were falling all around us, covering everything in a soft white blur. I stared at the late-winter snow. It always amazed me how fragile and still solid snowflakes could be. No one expected any snow in mid-February anymore; the winter had been long and soft, without any snow until now. And just when the first flowers were starting to bloom again…

"It's beautiful," I commented, looking around.

"Just like you," he suddenly whispered, only one single breath away from my ear. So close, yet so far.

"Sirius, please d-"

"Be my Valentine."

My mind emptied. "But you- Sirius, I- What, why?"

"Please?" His eyes were begging, pleading. Like the dog's would.

I could only nod dumbly, receiving the feeling of his lips against mine in response. I could only nod dumbly, promptly receiving the feeling of his lips against mine in response. My first kiss, with the classic heart-shaped-box with chocolates to go. Only later I found out that you were watching us that night. I'm sorry.

* * *

I never cared much about Valentine. Bad things happened on that day. Stupid Cupid. Everyone I once cared about left me that day.

Lily. Merlin, Lily.

Lupin.

Granger, a few years later.

I know it is wrong. Wrong like I knew back then that it was wrong to love them, and I know now that it is wrong to love her. I will never be loved back, but I do not need to be. Love is a senseless sentiment. She went off with the idiot, he hooked up with that other idiot Black, Granger with the redhead. Both Lupin and Granger deserve more. _Deserve me_. But I'm too low.

"Professor?" A quiet voice startled and snapped me back into reality. I outside for a walk at the sides of the lake, and it was snowing softly. I hated snow, ever since those fateful days.

"Miss Granger." I turned around to look at her, and gasped sharply. Despite the cold she wasn't wearing a cloak, left her hair was ruffled and windblown, her eyes were wide and frantic and wild.

"Hermione," I whispered. She confused me. Why would she show herself here, like this. The cold could be death of her, she was a smart girl, a woman, this was not without reason. She just stood there, then suddenly threw herself against me, sobbing into my chest. "Hermione-"

She looked up and put a finger on my lips.

"Don't spoil the silence. I want things to stay like this forever." She paused, hesitated. "Severus…"

That was the day I learned to stop hating the snow.

* * *

I'll be honest with you. I hate February. One, it's late winter; so it's cold and it rains and that is not pleasant. Two, the month itself is completely illogical and ridiculously short. Three, the overdose of extreme sappy-ness around the 14th. And believe me, I've had my share, don't worry. But it was suffocating me and I had to break free. I had no choice. But try to explain _that_ to _him_. He's so… Yes, sweet, but… Too much. Smothering. Mothering. Freud would have a field-day with his behavior.

"But 'Mione, I thought-"

"Ron..."

"But 'Mione… Why?"

"I can't go on like this. I'm sorry."

"But we've only been together for a year! You said we would stay together forever! Forever! You lied!"

"Ron! Don't- I was- we were so young back then… I don't want to- I can't explain." It was snowing, just as on the day that we got together. I was beginning to hate it, look at it as if it was choking me, just like him. It couldn't go on like this, I couldn't.

"What did I do wrong?"

"Nothing! Everything!"

Like a coward I ran away, into the snow. He didn't follow me, but we'd been through enough. He didn't have to. Now I think back, I can't believe it's been another year since then. Look at me now, lost in the snow again… But at least with a warm pair of arms to protect me.

* * *

I'll never know just what I did there. I'll never know why. I'll never know what could've happened if I hadn't been there, at the right place and at the right time. But that doesn't matter. That sort of thing never really matters.

The only thing I knew was that the slowly falling snow was comforting me, making me feel more at ease. I'd just fled from a crying Ron, and I wanted to be alone, somewhere were sound could mingle with vision without question. For once, without question… Rest.

But the moment I saw him, I knew that wasn't what I would be getting. Not at all.

"Malfoy," I attempted to sneer, but it came out weakly.

"Potter," he drawled, "Out in the cold? Why?" He looked so sincere that I answered truthfully without really thinking about it.

"Fleeing. Searching for some rest."

He raised one delicate eyebrow. "You? What for?"

"Broken hearts."

"Hm. Yours?"

"Nope."

"Pity." He stayed silent for a while. "I could mend it for you."

His nonchalance temporarily threw me off. "You could? And how'd that be, Malfoy?"

He just looked back at me, staring at me, refusing to let my eyes go. I'd never really noticed how much more light grey than dark grey his eyes were, but it was hard to ignore form this up close. It was piercing. Weird. It made me nervous. And then he smirked and turned back into the brat I'd known since first year, the one with the big mouth and the big words. So I smiled, which in retrospect, wasn't very smart.

"Like this."

Within seconds I was stuck with a mouth closing itself on mine in an almost tender gesture. You know when your mind screams at you to do something, right? But then you're paralyzed instead. And before you really notice you've leaned in, completely without order, all bodily function and no brain. And I kind of stayed like that for a while. A few minutes later I broke away, trying to get some oxygen, anything, eyes closed.

"So I guess you're my Valentine then, ey Malfoy?" I managed to choke out. Must've sounded hoarse.

"_Valentine_, Potter? You know I don't do muggle ho-"

I just cut him off. Hey, I knew Malfoy had taste, but who could've guessed he would taste this good?


End file.
